LET'S PLAY...

What comes to mind when you think of play? Perhaps you remember your childhood. Curiosity, wonder, and joy were part of your nature. How quickly we lose touch with our sense of play as adults! If play is essential in child development, why shouldn't it be essential in romantic relationships?

Studies have examined the benefits of gaming in romantic relationships. It has been found that couples who play games together experience greater relationship satisfaction, increased intimacy, and more positive emotions (Newman, 2020).

Playfulness in relationships isn't limited to joking around or tickling each other. You can also enjoy other types of games as a couple. Perhaps the first thing that comes to mind is role-playing, but there are other ways to integrate play into sexual encounters, such as using sex toys or other sexual aids.

Some people may feel intimidated by the idea of incorporating sex toys into their sexual activity. Many assume there's something wrong with them or their partner if they "need" a sex toy. People use sex toys for various reasons. Some use them because they find it easier to reach orgasm. Others use them as part of role-playing scenarios. Still others use them as part of foreplay, adding novelty to their sex life.

What are some of the most common types and how are they used?

Here's the explanation:

VIBRATORS

Vibrators are one of the most versatile sex toys. They come in almost every color and a wide range of sizes and functions. Why would anyone use a vibrator? Vibrators provide a sensation that is impossible for any human being to replicate. Whether used as part of solo or partnered play, vibrators are one of the many ways to facilitate orgasm and ensure pleasure and fun.

DILDOS

Many people use the terms vibrator and dildo interchangeably, but they are actually different. Dildos don't vibrate, and most resemble a penis. Their function is penetration. Some couples find strap-on dildos helpful when the male partner is unable to achieve or maintain an erection. Many same-sex couples also use them to enjoy penetrative sex.

BDSM

For BDSM (Bondage, Discipline/Domination, Submission/Sadism, and Masochism), there is a wide range of options available. You don't necessarily have to delve into the deepest aspects of the practice. You can consider easy-to-open handcuffs, soft whips, and blindfolds to experiment with light bondage, which many people find very enjoyable.

FOR THE PENIS

People with penises can enjoy many of the toys we've already mentioned, but they can also find great pleasure in masturbators. Some resemble a sleeve, while others look like a real vulva or vagina. There are also some so discreet they look like an Easter egg. In addition to using them during solo play, couples can use them when penetrative sex isn't possible or when their hand or jaw gets tired of manual or oral stimulation.

FOR COUPLES

There are many options couples can enjoy together. There are penis rings (worn around the base of the penis to help maintain an erection) that include vibrating attachments to stimulate the partner during penetration. There are also vibrators designed for women to use during penetrative sex. Technology has added to the options couples can enjoy together. Vibrators have been developed that can be controlled remotely via an app.

There's a wide variety of tools you can use to enhance your sex life or simply to boost an already satisfying one. Whatever your reason for bringing "toys" into the bedroom, remember that play can be very positive for your relationship... So, let's play!

SHENI MARTÍNEZ

Sexologist

@shenimartinezpr